I Found This Letter On Patrick's Hard Drive
Created - Wednesday, January 26, 2005 8:57:01 PM
Modified - Friday, February 18, 2005 4:37:40 PM
Even though it comes as no surprise to me, this news of her death, I can't help but think that I need to be there to be with her family, my family. When I am gone will it matter who's at the proceedings to commemorate my life? What if all I really did during my life really didn't matter? What if no one really cared about my passing? I can go to all of the old places where I use to spend my time and they'd be happy to see me in life, but would they go out of their way to see me at my final resting place?
Are there really those that suffer their entire lives worrying about the end?
The end. It seems so simple when I think about it. You live, you learn, you suffer, you laugh a little. Then you check out.
Simple.
Why do all of the opposing forces of nature want to make it last in another realm? What do these beliefs really do to life? Point in turn, what do they do to someone's death?
Christine was a Jehovah's Witness. Is there some sort of ritual they do for those who pass on? I am ignorant to it if they do.
Maybe this is a sign of things to come for me as well. Losing sight of my true self. Spending countless days in bed with nothing left to live for - crazy.
I need to write more often just so that I get these ideas onto paper - - maybe I'll be able to get a fix on what's been ailing me emotionally.
I do not need more interruptions. Someone to talk to would be nice though.
It's Saturday morning and I can't fall asleep. Not really sure what it is exactly, but there's something going on with my body that isn't quite right.
No one in Philly is returning my calls. HMMMM.
It's now 5 days later = = = = and CHRISTINE has died. Today at 1pm (AST). I called right when it happened - my other sister had her cell phone with herin the room. No one was able to contact
****line deleted****
****line deleted****
How many times will I have the chance to travel down this road before I am tthe one that people are commemorating?
January 31st is a date I shall never forget. The oldest sibling died. Not an easy death either. Alzheimers is awful.
Listening to Patsy Cline, cuz it reminds me of my mother. Who was also good friends with Christine.
Supposedly HIRED by the board of the Mat-Su Valley to be a substitute...
HMMMM....
No offers yet - guess I was too High maintenance for 'em...
woah.
crazy people.
Crazy Valley people.
Better get connected today.
yup.
Continuing on the connected thing - looks like I am slightly connected, but connections have consequences. Sometimes the stakes are high. Sometimes lives are involved. Too many times emotions are involved. Stay uninvolved??
Modified - Friday, February 18, 2005 4:37:40 PM
Even though it comes as no surprise to me, this news of her death, I can't help but think that I need to be there to be with her family, my family. When I am gone will it matter who's at the proceedings to commemorate my life? What if all I really did during my life really didn't matter? What if no one really cared about my passing? I can go to all of the old places where I use to spend my time and they'd be happy to see me in life, but would they go out of their way to see me at my final resting place?
Are there really those that suffer their entire lives worrying about the end?
The end. It seems so simple when I think about it. You live, you learn, you suffer, you laugh a little. Then you check out.
Simple.
Why do all of the opposing forces of nature want to make it last in another realm? What do these beliefs really do to life? Point in turn, what do they do to someone's death?
Christine was a Jehovah's Witness. Is there some sort of ritual they do for those who pass on? I am ignorant to it if they do.
Maybe this is a sign of things to come for me as well. Losing sight of my true self. Spending countless days in bed with nothing left to live for - crazy.
I need to write more often just so that I get these ideas onto paper - - maybe I'll be able to get a fix on what's been ailing me emotionally.
I do not need more interruptions. Someone to talk to would be nice though.
It's Saturday morning and I can't fall asleep. Not really sure what it is exactly, but there's something going on with my body that isn't quite right.
No one in Philly is returning my calls. HMMMM.
It's now 5 days later = = = = and CHRISTINE has died. Today at 1pm (AST). I called right when it happened - my other sister had her cell phone with herin the room. No one was able to contact
****line deleted****
****line deleted****
How many times will I have the chance to travel down this road before I am tthe one that people are commemorating?
January 31st is a date I shall never forget. The oldest sibling died. Not an easy death either. Alzheimers is awful.
Listening to Patsy Cline, cuz it reminds me of my mother. Who was also good friends with Christine.
Supposedly HIRED by the board of the Mat-Su Valley to be a substitute...
HMMMM....
No offers yet - guess I was too High maintenance for 'em...
woah.
crazy people.
Crazy Valley people.
Better get connected today.
yup.
Continuing on the connected thing - looks like I am slightly connected, but connections have consequences. Sometimes the stakes are high. Sometimes lives are involved. Too many times emotions are involved. Stay uninvolved??
posted by Victor | 8:30 PM
4 Comments:
damn.
I knew Patrick very well for over 14 years. He came Northeast in December 05 to visit me. I didn't realize I would never see him again. He was one of my dearest friends. He understood me.
I am deeply saddened for his friends and especially for his family.
Riposa in pace, il mio amico.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Dear anonymous,
Thank you for sending your sympathy to us the family. I know you are saddened just as we are..but I am greatful you got to visit with him 1 more time. It's great that he is still being memorialized...so many loved and cared for him. We all are deeply missing him. I am sure in my heart he is resting in peace when he is not singing in the heavens.
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